For some reason I am very cold and a little sad.
My mom she came in and did what she does every year. She said "I didn't get my daughter enough for Christmas". Usually or rather in the past she has then taken me out to pick something. This year I said "yes you did and no you don't have to get me anything more".
Reasons why my mom gives me plenty and does plenty for me.
She listens to me obsess and be overly anxious.
She tells me repeatedly not to worry.
She always helped me in school when I needed it, from kindergarten on. I would not have gotten as far as I did if she had not helped me.
When she goes on vacation she always calls me once a day.
She worries about me if I go out at night, she always wants to know where I am at or where I'm going.
She tells me that I am a good person and that I am her sweet daughter even when I'm not feeling so much the good person.
Even though I get annoyed with her and some times am not always nice to her she still loves me and still refers to as her sweet daughter. (except I have this theory that you tend to take things out on the people you care about and that care about you because they'll love you no matter what or so you assume).
She taught me my love of reading.
She has always been there for me and supportive of me.
She lets me come in to her room at night so that I can talk her ear off even though she's tired.
She doesn't think she got me enough for Christmas but she did..she got me plenty because she loves me.
There are a lot more reasons but these are the most important ones.
Merry Christmas everyone.
The council held a short Pleno on Wednesday 23rd December.
The main business was to discuss the costings for the Town Hall WiFi. A communication had been received from the authorities as to what we should charge for connections. We had a lengthy discussion about the rates to be charged and whether the elderly, students or the poor could have reduced rates. It was agreed that we should give heavily discounted rates, to such people, on proof of their qualification. We also agreed the rates in line with the advice and those shown previously.A start date for the fees ahs not yet beeen agreed but I guess it will be in the New Year. I also asked that we identify wheta periods people could pay for in advance (we don't want to have top pay every month) and that was also agreed.
We also agreed to apply for a loan from the bank and we are also considering changing the bank in which we hold Town Hall funds as currently we do not receive very generous account conditions.
Nothing else of much interest.
Pagi ini aku bangun dan ngerasa lega karena ... ternyata ini jatah liburku. Senang. Lumayan..libur dua hari sekaligus, 24 desember jatah libur mingguanku dan 25 desember natal. Besok pas tahun baruan juga libur panjang, dari 31 desember sampe 3 januari 2010.
Lena dalam teenlit the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants pernah merumuskan, kalo mau tau apakah pekerjaanmu itu pas apa engga buatmu, liatlah dari perasaanmu pada malam senin atau minggu malam. Yaitu, pada saat liburmu berakhir n hari kerjamu menjelang. Kaitannya sama aku, gini: kayaknya aku seneng banget kalo liburan n sering ngantuk kalo kerja. Artinya apa, hayo? :P
Bisa jadi emang dasar aku yang males. Bisa jadi emang ga terlalu cocok jadi "tenaga kerja". Karena, pada dasarnya jam kerjaku tu dikit banget. Lebih layak untuk dibandingkan dengan semacam summer job daripada permanent job. Tapi, duitnya lumayan. Jadi, intinya ... aku udah terbeli. Dan, mungkin aku cuma sedang kelelahan.
Kemaren bener2 hari yang melelahkan. Jam 9 pagi ada meeting di kafe. Kafenya belum buka so kami cuma make kursi outdoor n dibelikan kopi kalengan dari toserba mini. Meetingnya ngebahas tanaman merambat yang ga jelas namanya. Aku amazed dengan koordinator kami yang sering dan dengan nyaman menggunakan kata2 "idealisme, prinsip, tujuan, cita2". Inilah pekerjaan pertamaku yang secara terang2an dan tidak malu2 memprogramkan adanya semacam "suntikan keyakinan" seperti ini. Menurutku sederhana dan logis sih, apa yang dilakukannya: kami diharap dapat bekerja dengan lebih baik jika kami yakin dengan apa yang kami lakukan.
Bagiku, idealisme itu klise kalo ga diruntuhkan dulu n baru dikais-kais n direnggut dari puing2 yang tersisa. Idealisme instan n cangkokan, ga pernah dibenturkan, well, menurutku itu bukan idealisme. Ketika itu ga perlu nalar n tanpa ada daya kritis ya aku sepakat dengan orang yang bilang kalo itu sama dengan cuci otak. Tapi maklumlah begitu, karena agar dunia kerja bisa berjalan memang dibutuhkan sesuatu yang instan dan praktis!
Sebelum berangkat kerja, seusai meeting, kami makan bareng2. Makan aja heboh! Soalnya, rekan kerjaku masih muda2 semua, seringkali aku merasa pengen ketawa sendiri. Gara2, absurd sekali rasanya aku harus mengalami segala gejolak kemudaan teman2 yang rasanya, aduh, geli! Banyak yang masih kayak anak2, harus senantiasa diperhatikan. Banyak yang blingsatan karena cinlok. Ada juga menghalalkan kejudesannya dengan alasan lagi "dapet". Ada2 aja. Masih aja yang kayak gini eksis ya, di dunia kerja? Jangan lupa, FB tu penting banget. Cape deh kalo aku harus berteman ma mereka di kerjaan plus di FB juga. Kapan aku terbebas dari mereka :P
Habis makan ada yang ibadah, ada yang langsung berangkat ke lokasi kerja. Aku dapet lokasi di depan mirota batik. Rame sekali! Gila, pusing deh kepala. Dua hari sebelumnya sih kerjaku lumayan sukses di mirota batik ini. Tapi 23 desember ini aku gagal total. Semua rekan setimku, kami bertiga, gagal total. Yah, paling ngga, kami bisa foto sama artis! (Temen2ku pake istilah artis, so pardon me). Cantik banget, ketika difoto sepertinya kulitnya tuh bersinar gitu, sementara kami terlihat seperti rakyat jelata :P Anehnya, kami ga tau namanya siapa. Kami cuma tau dia main ftv "pacarku pendek sekali".
Salah satu temenku histeris banget. Pas si artis mau keluar dari mirota batik dia ngebego2in temen lain, nyuruh cepet2 pegang kamera. Jepret satu kali, dengan posisi duduk di kursi berkanopi depan mirota batik. Eh, belum cukup rupanya. Dia sampe2 kayak menguntit gitu di depan gedung agung, heboh,"sumpah dia mau ke sini! Sumpah dia lewat!". Hahaha... :lol:
Tambahan lagi ni ya, sampe sekarang dia masih heboh dengan "gigitan" si artis. Maksudnya, artis itu pas difoto senyum sambil gigit bibir bawah gitu. Trus bayangan temenku jadi aneh2 deh :P dan dia juga ikut2an gaya kayak gitu tiap kali difoto.
Pas break kami sekalian aja ikut ke depan gedung agung. Trus nyebrang ke depan benteng vredeburg, aku makan sate. Si rekan yang histeris itu makan2in sate aku tapi ga mau beli sendiri, hehe. Sampe satu jam kami istirahat, tapi rekan yang satu lagi delusional sok yakin bahwa kami istirahat ga nyampe 30 menit. Padahal, jam tanganku dan jam Ngejaman di malioboro menunjukkan udah satu jam. Dia sih bukan berdasarkan jam tapi berdasarkan takut dimarahin ketua. Apalagi kami memutuskan pulang lebih awal setengah jam, dia ketakutan banget sampe nyuruh2 aku dianterin biar ga ketahuan. Parno ih. Biarin aja wong aku suka jalan kaki sambil liat2 kanan kiri ini, ye!
Malamnya, kami ada farewell party karena si koordinator n rekannya dipindahtugaskan, ke jakarta n bandung. Kami nodong traktiran di resto super fancy. Wuih pokoknya mahal banget deh, life musicnya perkusi akustik gitu, belum lagi suasana n tempatnya yang pake lilin2 sepanjang jalan, trus ada lukisan2 gedeee, berasa gimana gitu! Aku kenyang karena pesen menu spesial, masakan india, bulgogi! Beuu..semuanya pas banget ma lidah aku. Temen2 lebih pilih ayam, bebek, dll. (Yah, itu sih standar.) Abis tu aku pesen minum mint. Sengaja aku pesen menu2 yang kira2 ga ada di tempat lain, hehe. Temen2ku kaget banget dengan rasa mint. Lah kalo sekadar minum strawberry milkshake, kan banyak di mana2, manisnya itu biasa banget n bisa ngilangin/matiin citarasa makanan tadi. Kalo tomato with mint kan diminum dingin gitu, ga manis, di dalem mulut jadi seger pedes kayak ada salju antartika, sampe ke hidung dan paru2. Kayak mau beku gitu! Temenku bilang rasanya kayak rokok menthol. Mungkin rasanya kayak odol juga :P
Abis tu mulailah bernorak ria: foto2. Awalnya ga enak ntar dianggap kampungan, lama2 eh foto2 terus. Di depan lukisan, di depan lilin2, semua deh. Yang lain pada anteng nikmatin makan n suasana, rombongan kami sibuk mengabadikan diri! Kok seperti sekali seumur hidup aja makan di sini! Wakakak!
Nah, pas mau pulang ada cerita lucu tentang miss universe dan black box. Aku ga pengen ketawa, so, masak maksa? Sebenernya apa yang aku pikirkan tu ternyata berlapis2 untuk sampe ke bagaimana reaksi aku. Jadi ya aku justru ketawa sendiri pas udah sampe di rumah mengingat cara berpikir n reaksi aku itu. Gatau deh, temen2 sering bilang selera humorku aneh. Tentang si black box ini sebenernya aku mau bilang "emang temen2 ga tau kalo black box itu warnanya ga item?" Black box kan metafor karena isinya konfidensial. Sementara warna kotaknya sendiri harus ngejreng supaya gampang ditemuin. Makanya, warnanya oranye. Eh, alih2 ngomong yang sebenarnya kayak gitu, aku malah hening n bilang "kan orang tu ga kotak?" Detil kayak gitu tuh aku pikirin, sampe sms si koordinator hehehe. Jadi biar deh, semakin orang mengenalku mereka akan makin bingung betapa anehnya aku, hihihi.
Akhirnya untuk menutup malam, mereka lanjut ke lounge atau apalah itu. Aku males banget. Mending pulang duluan. Mungkin orang mengira aku kesepian karena orang rumah udah pada tidur. Tapi aku bisa nemuin temen2ku sendiri kok. Misalnya aku lagi nyelesaiin baca e-book forever in blue (sisterhood of the traveling pants 4). Tokoh2nya tuh mengingatkanku pada sobat2 sma aku. Mereka mau ke jogja loh dalam rangka libur akhir taun! Duh kangen, kami udah pencar2 gini, kayak punya jalan hidup sendiri2 dan ga saling bertemu di persimpangan. Aku juga bisa ngeblog di hari libur, ternyata menyenangkan sekali! Inilah suaraku, kalo kata casseybunn "be a voice not an echo".
I love u, dear readers! Makasih udah mau baca seserpih kehidupan aku :)
Called into the Town Hall this morning just to let Andreas know that his phone call on my behalf regarding the 40 euro fine I had received from Granada, and been trying to pay since September, had got a reaction at last. It had prompted a new bill this time for 300 euros. Great!
She's ninety and it's hard for her to see. Glaucoma has made her world blurry and the only way she can look at her gossip magazines is with a lighted magnifying glass. The glass can't help her to read though, those days are over.
Her nails bother her and the kids joke that she shouldn't let me near them - I cut everything too short. But she does want me near them and she asks if I will trim them for her. I'm nervous about this, the last thing I want to do is injure her and I don't have my reading glasses with me. I'm at the stage where I can still read my watch and a menu without glasses, but I won't sign a contract without them and I probably shouldn't pull out splinters or go after eyelashes unless they're on. I really should start to carry them with me.
Glasses or no, she wants me to help her, and I can't say no. I pick up her cosmetics bag and find her nail trimmer and nail file. "Do I have an emery board?" she asks doubtfully. Yes, sweetie, I've got it.
I gently pick up one hand and cut the end of the nail, careful not too cut it too short. She tests the length against another finger, then her cheek. "That's perfect." Carefully, slowly, I cut and file the rest of them.
Together we examine the polish and decide her nail color is still pretty - no need to repaint. She feels all of her fingertips one by one and thanks me in a more heartfelt manner than I deserve. This chokes me up a little. Small pleasures. Small gifts. Little things that matter.
At the airport, I am overcome with the same feeling I always get when I leave her. What if this is the last time we see each other? Have I made her feel loved enough? Does she know how much she matters to us?
Cassandre starts to tear up at the airport, looking at a carved stone heart "made in Utah." She wants it to remind her of this trip. To remind her of her great-grandmother. I remind her that she'll be back next month, she'll see her again soon. She nods solemnly and asks me again to please buy her the necklace. She promises to pay me back. (Who could ask for the money?)
At home Cassandre picks up the ancient candlesticks my grandfather sent to my grandmother from England right before he was shot down and killed over Germany in WWII. I am responsible for taking care of these precious memories, but I have not washed them lately and they are tarnished and dirty. Cassandre wants to clean them and together we take them apart, piece by loving piece. We wash and dry each one, noting where the silversmith has encoded "A" "B" "C" and "5" "6" "7" so we know exactly which part goes back where. Soap and water make good progress, but not enough. We buy some polish to bring the shine back.
It makes us feel connected to do this work. Hands on labor to restore some dignity to something so precious. We don't try to make it perfect, just better.
Im going home
Downhearted and hoping
Im close to some new beginning
I know
Theres a reason for everything
That comes and goes
But so many people are looking to me
To be strong and to fight
But Im just surviving
I may be weak but Im never defeated
And Ill keep believing
In clouds with that sweet silver lining
Most days
I try my best to put on a brave face
But inside
My bones are cold and my heart breaks
But all the while
Somethings keeping me safe
And alive
But so many people are looking to me
To be strong and to fight
But Im just surviving
I may be weak but Im never defeated
And Ill keep believing
In clouds with that sweet silver lining
I wont give up like this
I will be given strength
And now that Ive found it
Nothing can take that away
I completed the work on the inventory and took it into Salvadores office this morning. We checked off the first few properties and I seem to have done it correctly. He is now going to work through, updating his computer, and will let me know if there are any problems. There were one or two that I have issues about and so I will await his response when he gets to them.
I'm done with school and I am exhausted but for some reason sleep has not been coming easily to me. I have been tossing and turning for the past three nights. I wake up around 1 am and I can' t seem to fall back to sleep for another hour. Then I woke up around 6 am and had the same problem. I am so exhausted and yet my mind won't let me sleep, it's just racing a million miles a minute. Hopefully tonight I will finally fall asleep.
Friday I had a ceremony that was just for my school. They had refreshments for us and we could talk with all the professors and our parents could meet with them as well. It wasn't a cap and gown ceremony so we just wore business casual clothing. I was so nervous that I pretty much didn't eat the entire day. I really don't like being the center of attention and I get really nervous being in front of crowds even if I don't have to say anything! They did pass out a little certificate and did a couple of speeches.
That night my brother, dani and the kids showed up and brought New York Pizza which is just sooo yummy. We basically just talked for the night and didn't do anything exciting and then I went to bed early but couldn't sleep. I woke up Saturday and Dani did my makeup which was really nice of her and I think she did a good job. I was again really nervous for this ceremony because this time I was walking across a stage to get a memento of sorts. Also my whole entire family was coming to this ceremony as well as other important people in my life. I was having panic attacks in the morning and almost crying and Dani had just done my makeup so I had to keep calming myself down. Then my mom came in and told me how proud she was of me and almost made me cry again! The ceremony ended up going well and I found some friends to sit with so I wasn't alone. However when I was walking across the stage and I basically tuned everyone out and just looked straight ahead. I didn't hear anyone cheering for me because I was just way to nervous.
My mom threw a party for me and we had Eegees and cup cakes as well as a couple of other treats. It was a very a nice day but again I ended up being really exhausted but like I said I couldn't sleep :o(.
We celebrated Christmas with my brother and his family today. We had a family breakfast and then opened presents. After they left I went with my mom to the grocery store because it's her birthday and I thought I'd help out. After that I have pretty much just sat here doing nothing except reading through my google reader and uhh staring at the wall. If there are any mistakes in this I apologize now but I'm too tired to go back and read through it and check it!
Read because: I'm listening to all the HP books on CD
Borrowed from: the Sacramento Library
Rating: 8 out of 10
Synopsis: Harry is back and in fine form in the third installment of his adventures at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. His summer with the hideous Dursley family is cut short when, during a fit of quite understandable rage, he turns his Aunt Marge into an enormous balloon and then runs away. Soon, it becomes quite apparent that someone is trying to kill him; even after Harry is ensconed in the safety of fall term at Hogwarts, the attacks continue. Myriad subplots involving a new teacher with a secret, Hermione's strangely heavy class schedule, and enmity between Ron's old rat, Scabbers, and Hermione's new cat, Crookshanks, all mesh to create a stunning climax. The pace is nonstop, with thrilling games of Quidditch, terrifying Omens of Death, some skillful time travel, and lots of slimy Slytherins sneaking about causing trouble.
My review: I really like book 3 of the series. Things get really dark, with omens of death for Harry, a mass murderer on the loose, and some really close calls for the three wizards. I also love the introduction of Sirius Black (played by Gary Oldman in my head), who is one of my favorite characters in the entire series. He's extra crazy in this book, and it's really fun to watch Rowling develop his character, not to mention the characters of other adults in the book -- Snape, James Potter, Pettigrew, and Lupin. I also really like Lupin in this book, and how he gives support to Harry when most others write him off. And once again, Jim Dale is the best audio book reader out there. (Finished 11/23/09)
